10 years

Yesterday Paul and I celebrated our 10 yr wedding anniversary. We have managed to pack a lot in to those quick 10. We have had great times and not so great times but all I can say have been blessings in one way or another. We started very early into our marriage losing my brother at a young 28 (which is the age I am now and feels very odd to be as old as my older brother was). The blessing was knowing his heart was marked for Christ and I will hug him again someday. Shortly after we welcomed our first baby into the world. Followed by 3 more little sets of feet that run through our house spreading joy and an occasional mess, or was that the other way around. hmmmm Then we were carried through the loss of our little boy, Carter. I say carried because I know God scooped this heartbroken mommy up into His arms until I was ready to walk again. Then we added our newest little guy to the bunch.
We have had our ups and our downs and we have always had each other. Marriage is a TON of work. More so than I ever would have thought. Mom and Dad, you made it look way too easy!
So we had a pretty mellow day around here but that was fine in the end. I went on a shopping trip to Target with Jac and that was just what we both needed. OK, scaring her in the toy aisle with a giant plastic tarantula may have been a little more for me. :0). Mom and Dad dropped by for a few minutes to bring us a gift which was very sweet. Then we wrapped up the night with a pizza party with the 7 of us. All in all, a very nice day.
I am planning on venturing over to church this weekend. Our church has DVD's of each service but the music is not quite the same. I need my Andy fix. :) ( He is our worship leader who is a cross between Bob Carlisle and a little bit of rock to me. )

I also want to say a huge thanks to everyone who left such encouraging words the other day. I needed them as I am sure you knew. They really touched my heart in such a huge way. I am the first in my local family to home school so at times I feel like I am on an island and it ain't Barbados. :) Thank you so much!!!

Have a fantastic weekend!!!

Uuuggggg

When you find yourself sitting on the couch absolutely glued to the TV watching Super Nanny.......not because you can't believe how some children act.....but more like you are trying to gain any useful tips to help you "get through" the day........feeling like this could very well be your own family on tv is......well it just isn't good. To say I am struggling with the kids would be an understatement. I am tired and drained and feel very overwhelmed. I love my kids and they are my world. But right now I am just wondering if we are in fact doing the right thing.
The reason we first talked about homeschooling was so Jac(dc #2) would not have to attend full time K. I felt and still feel an 8hr day away from home is too much for a 5 year old. Then Paul and I talked and we really felt led to homeschool because we wanted the kids to really have strong character, know right from wrong and have a personal relationship with Christ to guide them in their life. We never said we would homeschool forever. We felt we would take it one year at a time.
Now here I sit, curriculum bought wondering if I should just send them to public school. I feel like we dropped the ball on the girls. The things that were so important to us fell by the wayside and we were just trying to "get through" our days.
I had dreams of our kids getting along, enjoying each others company and us all having this great adventure in life. Nope. Our days are filled with bickering, griping, complaining and that's just from Paul and I. :0) JK. It's not that way all the time but it just feels like it at time.
Part of me really wants to make this work and another part of me wants to take what I feel is the easy way out. (Not that sending your children to public school is taking the easy way out. But for our season of life right now I feel God pushing me to do something I just don't want to therefor I would be taking the easy way out.)
I am tired, my clothes don't fit, my kids wear me out, money is tight and I feel stuck in a rut. More than anything I lack discipline BIG TIME. The sad thing is most of these things would go away if I could get my act together. Could it be because I am trying to handle things all on my own. I haven't been to church in 10 weeks (we are keeping P home until around 12 weeks due to him being a premie) but that's no excuse for not cracking open my bible.
I guess I am writing thise because maybe seeing all this in type will help me to realize what the problems really are. Please pray for me that .......honestly I don't even know what exactly to pray for. I am just tired of "getting through". I want more for me and I want more for my family. Maybe God is putting little thorns in my test so I can focs on what my priorities should be rather than what they are.

One of the places we learn

This is our main work area. My Dad found those cabinets on clearance for $25.00 each. I love a great deal and boy can we fill those up.
This is where the kids work. We wanted to make sure there was enough room for the older 4 to be able to work all at the same time. Some day we would like an old formal dining room table that we all could sit at but for now this works fine. :)
The rainbow storage unit is where the girls store their books by subject. The piano is where the boys make "music".
This is our homemade calendar. We used items from the Dollar Spot at Target last year. The pieces velcro to the foam board. I think this cost about $5.00 to put together. :)
This is an idea I found on Heidi Swapp's blog and we all love it. It's a tray that we put in the middle of the table and everyone has easy access to all the crayons, markers, colored pencils and other goodies. It's so functional and pretty cute too. :)

I would love to see the places you learn too. SO, if you have pics please feel free to post your links. We are still looking to fill in some gaps so if you see something missing let us know. We love all the help we can get. :0)

Our Bumbo Boy

The cool thing about having kids over the last 8 years is the new things that come out with each new baby. Now this may have been around for a while but for us it is brand new, a bumbo chair. I put P in it this morning and he looks so cute. He lasted about 3 minutes but that was long enough for me to snag a pic. Now it is back to school with the girls. Have a great day!